Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Whatever happened to "malasakit"?

Apparently, everybody has gone home.
Schools, offices, both government and private.


Everybody but us. And yet, we are a company who boasts of having utmost concern for our people.




Oh well, times have changed. And i am not just talking about being sent home during storms. :(

Storm signals up.

Stormy Tuesday is reflective of my state of mind today. Or one might be an effect of the other.

Was about to say that it's a case of chicken vs. egg, but who am i kidding to think that my mood could have an effect on the weather? The closest probability is that my perception of the severity of the weather has something to do with my mood. On an early Tuesday!

Friggin' umbrella broke on me today. I, myself, am so close to breaking too.

And the week has just started.

I could have been breezing the storm away because of several pseudo-achievements at work. Then again, pseudo-achievements have been slightly marred with the realization that i am still a few notches below completing everything in my plate this year - and it will be October in a few days. Barely a month to go before our next Board reporting.

On the other hand, maybe I should consider it a good sign that I have been this involved with work. A hundred-eighty degree turn from how I was last year. But hey, everything has been a hundred-eighty degrees different today compared to last year. I was fat and pregnant and did not care about anything else but my bulging tummy.

Now, I have my 9-month old Qube and loads of presentation materials to finish.

I soo envy those sleeping in today. Wet and stormy dreams to everyone.

Thursday, September 22, 2011

Missing.

Thirteen hours away from home, and i am already missing my little imp.



I promised the husband* that i won’t be writing any blog entries tonight.

But what the heck, this is my first night free of motherly responsibilities and wife duties, so i will celebrate it by….

…staying in my hotel room writing about how  much I am already missing Qube I want to cry. Only that I’ve been told not to think of him a lot, else he won’t be able to sleep through the night. I hope he does.

I hope I’d be able to sleep too. I’ve already forgotten how it feels not to have Qube sleep beside me.

And for the husband*, I also will not pass the chance to tell the world about how, at 1:30 in the morning, you had me brought you to the ER because of pins and needles on you arm, heart burn, backache, nausea, headache, and what have yous – the night before my very first overnight trip away from home. Go figure. :)


Haaay, I miss you both.

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Eighth Highlights.

Technically, it's still during the eighth month.

Went home last Friday with a not-so-good mood and a giant headache. I was greeted by a smiling Qube doing "The Close-Open".

Was i happy? I was ecstatic and the giant headache suddenly vanished!

Before the eighth month ends, let me count the ways that Qube made me smile on this particular month:  

1. Close - Open: When we had just about given up on him learning to do it.

Starting on his 3nd month, we had been trying to teach him this, but he always seemed oblivious to my and his dad's efforts.

But last Friday, when I arrived and Yaya asked him to show me – he closed his fist tightly, then opened it to show his palm, then he did it two more times. There was no mistaking it; he was really doing The Close – Open!

The catch? He refuses to do it more than twice a day. Or twice to the same person. Stubborn little imp. 

2. Dance, dance: Nobody taught him. Well, I am not sure if Yaya did, but since both I and his dad never learned how to dance properly, we simply did not include it in our agenda to teach Qube. Maybe his daily dose of Showtime is to blame.
We just noticed one night that each time the Dell Fabric Conditioner commercial comes up on TV, he would suddenly turn and stare intently at the TV. Then he would begin swaying his head and move his body in tune with the jingle. That is when we recognized that he was dancing. Several more of  “May one rinse na ang Dell, may one rince na ang Dell…” sang by yours truly, confirmed our theory that he was indeed dancing to the TV jingle.

Now, his repertoire includes: Gotta Feeling by the Black Eyed Peas, Pokerface by Lady Gaga, On the Floor by J. Lo, The Time (Dirty Bit) by Black Eyed Peas, The Sweet Escape by Gwen Stefani and Akon, and a selection of nursery rhymes and bedtime songs.

Oh, and yes, he dances when he likes his food.

3. Clap them softly, 1, 2, 3: The first few times he did it should not counted. Because they were so random and not connected with any particular emotion.
This time, he claps when he is happy, when he sees something on TV that delights him, when he sees Mama about to pick him up, when he is playing with Leopard (his Animaland stuffed bestfriend), when he is playing peek-a-boo with Papa, when he dances.

4. Alive, Awake, Alert, Enthusiastic: Whenever I arrive home from work, I always try to sneak to the bathroom, have a drink of water, change my clothes, before I show myself to Qube. Else, he would be jumping with outstretched arms and shouting “Mama”, and I would not be able to disengage myself from him until a few hours later.
And every day after work, at playtime, he’d start to babble animatedly, hold his breath, tense his body, and squeal. He always does this when he is excited or when he is very eager to talk. And always, I’d have to rub him on his back to make him relax and just try to talk slowly.

5. Crawling little pig everywhere: By now, I’m getting used to turning towards my back first before making any move, to be sure that I would not be stepping on a crawling Qube, because he now makes his presence known in every nook of our apartment.
At eight months, we could no longer just sit and watch TV peacefully. It would always be either me or Papa chasing Qube everywhere.

One of these days, I might just tie him on a leash. Promise.

6. Bedtime singing: I’ve already mentioned in another blog entry that whenever I sing him to sleep, he’s start to slap my face and take over my singing. He does it every night.
Last night, because I want to tease him and test his singing prowess, I started singing in a falsetto. And he did the same!

But because I do not want to make false claims when I boast this to friends, and especially when I write about it, I modified my singing to use my normal voice. And he hummed in his normal voice. Still, not contented because it might have been just a coincidence, I again sang in falsetto voice. And yes, my Qube also began humming in falsetto.

Well, picture me smiling smugly to the husband*. The baby took after me, afterall.

There are many more little things that Qube does to make us proud parents believe that he is the best eight-month old there is today. But of course, all proud parents think this too.

This ends our amazing – eight journey.

Welcome to nine months, Qube.

Friday, September 16, 2011

Thursday, I don't care about you...

And Friday,

I don't feel loved.



Put simply, this week is not my best week.
With a combination of female hormones, frenzy at the workplace, lack of sleep, and chaos at home, what should one expect?

Only new mothers would understand. I think.

To cap off this week, here are song fragments that have been playing on and off inside my head to describe how I feel, because I am in no mood to use my own words:


Unwell – Matchbox 20

“I'm feeling like I'm headed for a breakdown
I don't know why
I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell”

Stomach Flu, Hangover-like headache without the booze, bad dreams this week. Yes, I am unwell.


The Scientist  - Coldplay

“Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said it would be this hard
Oh let’s go back to the start.”

Well, the newness of everything is still overwhelming, even after nine months.


Better Days – Goo Goo Dolls

“And you ask me what I want this year
And I try to make this kind and clear
Just a chance that maybe we’ll find better days
‘cause I don’t need boxes wrapped in strings
And desire and love and empty things
Just a chance that maybe we’ll find better days.”

I could go on singing this song ‘til the end and all the lines are so apt!


Minamalas – Mojofly

I like it now more than ever – from start to finish, and especially this line:

“Minamalas, kase wala na akong mahanap na iba…”

Repeat ten times.


Imbecilesque – Rivermaya

“Good morning baby
Are you still mad at me?
I guess I couldn't blame you
I instigated this big mess
I acted imbecillesque
Yeah I know..”

Most times, it’s intentional. To make you feel as terrible as I do.


It’s hard to say I do, when I don’t - Fall Out Boy

“I speak fast and I'm not gonna repeat myself
So listen carefully to every word I say:
"I'm the only one who's gonna get away with making excuses today,
You're appealing to emotions that I simply do not have"

This should not have been included hadn’t somebody popped “The Question” early this morning. So, there.


Spend My Life – Eric Benet

“Can I just see you every morning when I open my eyes
Can I just feel your heart beating beside me every night
Can we just feel this way together till the end of all time
Can I just spend my life with you”

Of course. Despite all the talk, this is still my song.
 

Little James – Oasis

“thank you for your smile
you make it all worthwhile
to us”

Just this morning before leaving for work, I looked at my sleeping Qube and yes,  you make it all worthwhile, my little James Quasar Qyle.