someday i will take these flowers to the sky.

Unpublished draft: April 20, 2009

what happens when your clever lines no longer amaze me,
or when familiarity makes your humor seem dull,
when your smile losses its novelty and no longer brightens my day,
when your arrogance no longer impresses or intimidates me,
when there's no electricity in your touch.
when i just go through the motions because, well, that is what i do.

there must be something more than just the convenience of having you around all the time that keeps me from leaving, from giving this all up.
when your cleverness shifts from being thought-provoking to simply being (temper) provoking.
or when i am forced to politely laugh in response to your jokes, because too much togetherness makes it all predictable.
when there's no joy in just being with you.

(when i almost cried listening to Your Universe because i miss feeling that way around you)
when the perceived convenience of having you is already causing too much inconvenience.



and yet not having you is much more terrifying and inconceivable,



then i believe it is love that still keeps me around.