panic attack #758

This week has been full of decisions for me. Today, i am making a major one yet again.

Hi, my name is Che. I am 25 years old.

Yes, i have decided to keep my age at 25. I know, i know, you just shut up. This means no birthdays for me for the next few years (four, maybe - go figure.)

This means that when meeting new people, or when anybody asks about my age, i should not be with somebody who i went to school with in prep, grade school, or anybody i have consistently spent birthdays with for the past few years.

Meaning, i should totally forget about my birth certificate, buried somewhere inside the condo unit in pasong-tamo, where i used to live, abandoned, but is still under my name until now.

What triggered this? My boss. Who kept on telling us audit ladies that, unlike men, we are like ticking clocks.

Therefore, i have to do something to stop this clock from ticking so fast. So there, i choose a random age from the air, and settled for 25.

A few years ago, i said that 23 is the best age for any woman.

No pressures to have a stable career. that was the time that i can still choose to bum around and still not be ashamed to ask for a living allowance from my Dad.

I did not feel the need to earn my own money then. I live at my Dad's house, i get free food, free cable TV, free internet, etc.. Each time he thinks that our househelp is beginning to look better than i do, i get shopping money too. Which, by the way, isn't all spent on clothes. 75% always goes to booze.

At 23, i did not feel the need to explain to anybody why i was not in a relationship. Heck, if i fooled around then, that was because i was only 23.

Well, a decade before i was 23, i decided that i should get married at 23. I thought then that by the time i am 23, i'd have my first million pesos in my savings account already.

Also, at 13, i figured that i'd have graduated at 20 (with honors, of course!), then companies will be killing each other to get my services, i'd be driving my own volvo by then, and yes, i'll be with a gorgeous and rich boyfriend who i will eventually marry before i turn 24.

There was more to that, but it is getting to be depressing. :)

A decade and two years later (:P), none of my childhood dreams happened.

I had a hard time graduating in college, i shifted courses before finally deciding that i hate accountancy but am going to finish it anyway,

i almost choked when asked why i have 5, 6, wait... 8! failed subjects in an interview with an SGV Senior Director,

i have an okay job but not even one company begged me to choose them,

i don't have even a hundred thousand in my bank account,

i have LOANS!,

i do not have a car (which is okay because i never learned to cross the street, anyway).

And, well, i am not married, not even close.

i am writing this to put on record that, today, i have officially declared myself 25 years old.